Four months since we said goodbye

Today marks four months since we lost our sons.  I didn't realize it until just now when I used today's date.  I would have been 33 weeks pregnant this week.  I would assume I would have been huge and uncomfortable.  Or there is the chance I would have been snuggling with my little guys, staring at them in disbelief that Todd and I actually created these miracles.  Instead I am empty and sad and still wondering why me?  Why them?!?

Mommy and Daddy love you very much, my angels.