Monday, August 27, 2012


So I am 99.9% sure we are out this month.  Devastating results yet again.  I had a good cry on Saturday morning and then proceeded to take some cold meds because I have a serious head cold.  I can only hope we get our rainbow soon.

So here is the plan moving forward.

This next cycle I will have my tubes checked again.  This cycle will be unmedicated but I will monitor on my own to see if I ovulate on my own which I have done a couple times in the past.

I am also working on losing 40 pounds.  This is not just for my own health but in preparation for the worst.

After this unmedicated cycle the plan is to do two more IUI cycles and if still no success we will move on to IVF.

IVF requires me to lose that 40 pounds in addition we must also save up $14,000 to cover the meds and the procedure.  As of right now I have no idea how we are going to afford it which keeps us from knowing when we will be able to move forward in out journey.

Sad to think that losing 40 pounds would be the easy part!

I am hoping and praying that over the next few months we find our miracle and to have this come to us "naturally" but I have to accept what the next steps may bring and be prepared for whatever it is going to take to get us our own child.

If I am lucky enough to lose the weight over the next 4-6 months.  And if we have a miraculous windfall, maybe, just maybe we could do IVF in the Spring of 2013.  That would be the best case scenario.

Please keep us in your thoughts...this road gets harder every day that passes and my entire family has suffered the loss of the twins.  I can only hope we can find the child we so deserve.

I appreciate al the prayers and love you give everyday and I couldn't have asked for a better support system.

Monday, August 20, 2012


Well it's been one week since the IUI.  They definitely saw the follie in a state of ovulation.  So I am still in a holding pattern...I hate this part of the process.  I really do.

I have so much hope for this cycle, I can only hope that all the thoughts and prayers will bring us a rainbow.

This Wednesday, August 22nd will mark the one year anniversary of the most surreal day of my life.  It was the day that I took a home pregnancy test and got two beautiful lines.

It was the most amazing feeling in the world to know that through all of our struggle we finally achieved our dream!!  I can't even put into words how it felt that day just knowing that our lives would change forever.

I'll go ahead and share what we saw on our 4th anniversary last September 8th.  We thought it would be the perfect idea to get our first ultrasound on our anniversary.  How memorable!!!

Then all of a sudden there they were.  Two perfect and identical miracles.  :)  God I miss them so much...

There were a lot of memorable things last year that are so hard to believe because I don't have my babies in my arms...

Miss you Tobin and Miles!  So much!!

Friday, August 10, 2012

Progress...I hope...

So I went today and the doctor measured a 15mm follicle on the left - no other growth.  My E2 was at 148 - not that high...not as high as I would like to see it.  IUI is set for Monday morning and I am concerned that I will have a viable follicle.  I am asking for an ultrasound prior to the IUI to make sure.
I hope this works!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

In process

Phew!  Sorry it's been over a week!

It's been busy at our house.  Cleaning and we are doing something in town called the Parade of Homes.  This lets us visit new construction homes that the builders have declared their best.  You pay $10 and get access to all 24 homes.  It's lots of fun.

Also work has been picking up.  I have been writing business and finally wrapping up that huge account I have been working on.

Things are moving slowly this month on the TTC front.  Just starting to respond to the meds.  Hopefully not much longer until we are able to do IUI.  Probably next week.