Diet - yet another journey

So after meeting with the acupuncturist last week I am trying a new diet per her recommendation.  It's basically the Alkaline Diet - eating less acidic foods and I am also cutting out dairy for right now.  I went grocery shopping today and instead of buying things in boxes and jars and bags, I bought a lot of stuff that was fresh.  I bought kale and made crispy kale chips in the oven, and I made guacamole from scratch, filled with all fresh foods.  So it may cost more to buy groceries, but I know it's healthier for me.

I can still eat a lot of what I ate before - I just eat it differently.  For example - having burgers tonight.  93% lean ground beef on a grain roll with no cheese.  I might actually put some of that guacamole on the burger.  Much healthier than what I used to eat.  I'll pair it was a nice fresh salad with all fresh produce and I'll be happy.  :)

After going grocery shopping I know I can do this.  :)  I'm actually excited about changing my eating habits!  (Talk to me again in a week...LOL)

Acupuncture

This afternoon I am meeting with a fertility acupuncturist.  A friend of mine works for the office and got me a free two hour consultation.  Apparently she has great success rates but I am curious to see how it all works, and if it could work for me.  It's about an hour away so it's not the most convenient place, but if I went once a week and add in the gas costs, it's still cheaper than my IUIs would be every month.  I'm anxious to hear what she has to say.

I'll update after to let you all know what it's all about.  :)

Finally Updating

Well my period has come and gone and another cycle ended up with no miracles.

Todd and I sat down and had a discussion with my fertility specialist, Dr. Murray.  We are tired of throwing money at IUI and having no positive results.

Because we were both in agreement that we were frustrated we decided to move onto in vitro fertilization, or IVF.  This was not an easy decision to make.  We aren't fortunate enough to have any insurance coverage for these treatments.  Our IUI cycles could cost us up to $3,000 a month!  I don't want to throw anymore money at it, and neither does Todd.

So here is the plan...

I have to lose 25 pounds.  I am not sure how long that will take especially with my PCOS, which makes it harder to lose the weight.  As soon as I am down that much I can contact Dr. Murray to start the preliminary testing.  There are some ultrasounds and I'll need to be on birth control and there is some blood work to be done as well.  Then once that cycle is over and I get a period then I can start stimulating follicle growth.  Because I have PCOS I should have a good chance of producing over 15 eggs.  Once they feel I have enough I will go in for surgery where they will remove all the eggs.  Then they will mix Todd's sperm in with the eggs and hope for fertilization.  Depending on how they look they will transfer back two eggs and freeze whatever are left.  Then we would wait until we could test to see if one or both implanted.

The whole process will cost us about $15,000.  That's for one shot.  I never thought we would be here since the boys were conceived on an IUI cycle, but four IUI cycles and two natural cycles later and still nothing.  It's heart breaking.  I am taking some time to just work on myself and get healthy and save up money if we can.  We would love to do this by the end of the year, but we will have to see. 

I wanted everyone to know what road we were taking because it's not an easy road to choose.  Todd and I are not ready to give up.  We still want our child.  And if this is the road we have to take then so be it.

By taking this method of conception our chances of conceiving increase from 18% with IUI to 48% with IVF resulting in a live birth.  To us that is worth the $15,000.

I'll be in touch letting you know how we are doing.  I'm just hoping the weight loss is easy and we can move forward quickly.

99.9%

So I am 99.9% sure we are out this month.  Devastating results yet again.  I had a good cry on Saturday morning and then proceeded to take some cold meds because I have a serious head cold.  I can only hope we get our rainbow soon.

So here is the plan moving forward.

This next cycle I will have my tubes checked again.  This cycle will be unmedicated but I will monitor on my own to see if I ovulate on my own which I have done a couple times in the past.

I am also working on losing 40 pounds.  This is not just for my own health but in preparation for the worst.

After this unmedicated cycle the plan is to do two more IUI cycles and if still no success we will move on to IVF.

IVF requires me to lose that 40 pounds in addition we must also save up $14,000 to cover the meds and the procedure.  As of right now I have no idea how we are going to afford it which keeps us from knowing when we will be able to move forward in out journey.

Sad to think that losing 40 pounds would be the easy part!

I am hoping and praying that over the next few months we find our miracle and to have this come to us "naturally" but I have to accept what the next steps may bring and be prepared for whatever it is going to take to get us our own child.

If I am lucky enough to lose the weight over the next 4-6 months.  And if we have a miraculous windfall, maybe, just maybe we could do IVF in the Spring of 2013.  That would be the best case scenario.

Please keep us in your thoughts...this road gets harder every day that passes and my entire family has suffered the loss of the twins.  I can only hope we can find the child we so deserve.

I appreciate al the prayers and love you give everyday and I couldn't have asked for a better support system.

7dpiui

Well it's been one week since the IUI.  They definitely saw the follie in a state of ovulation.  So I am still in a holding pattern...I hate this part of the process.  I really do.

I have so much hope for this cycle, I can only hope that all the thoughts and prayers will bring us a rainbow.

This Wednesday, August 22nd will mark the one year anniversary of the most surreal day of my life.  It was the day that I took a home pregnancy test and got two beautiful lines.

It was the most amazing feeling in the world to know that through all of our struggle we finally achieved our dream!!  I can't even put into words how it felt that day just knowing that our lives would change forever.

I'll go ahead and share what we saw on our 4th anniversary last September 8th.  We thought it would be the perfect idea to get our first ultrasound on our anniversary.  How memorable!!!

Then all of a sudden there they were.  Two perfect and identical miracles.  :)  God I miss them so much...

There were a lot of memorable things last year that are so hard to believe because I don't have my babies in my arms...

Miss you Tobin and Miles!  So much!!

Progress...I hope...

So I went today and the doctor measured a 15mm follicle on the left - no other growth.  My E2 was at 148 - not that high...not as high as I would like to see it.  IUI is set for Monday morning and I am concerned that I will have a viable follicle.  I am asking for an ultrasound prior to the IUI to make sure.
I hope this works!

In process

Phew!  Sorry it's been over a week!

It's been busy at our house.  Cleaning and we are doing something in town called the Parade of Homes.  This lets us visit new construction homes that the builders have declared their best.  You pay $10 and get access to all 24 homes.  It's lots of fun.

Also work has been picking up.  I have been writing business and finally wrapping up that huge account I have been working on.

Things are moving slowly this month on the TTC front.  Just starting to respond to the meds.  Hopefully not much longer until we are able to do IUI.  Probably next week.